Smart people tell stories, fools vomit facts and jargon
Don’t Worry So Much About Who Said It
You don’t need to know Socrates from top to bottom and Nietzsche from left to right to understand life. I’ve compiled below little incidents which occurred in the last year. Each of them taught me a lesson. I knew those lessons from whatever I had learned by following different people from the fields of decision making, creativity and marketing but when I experienced their lessons first-handedly, mental muscle memory kicked in. It was surreal. I saw the Matrix. And I want to you know the same so that you’re prepared to see the Matrix when the chance comes. Before you move ahead, keep in mind the following two things:-
- These moments happened to me. They’ll never exactly happen to you. Don’t take me literally but understand the broader meaning.
- My lessons with one person can’t translate to another person. So I’ve made sure to not draw concrete conclusions about the world based on my tiny experience with specific people.
Now that you’re with me and the foundational premise has been laid, it is time to get wise.
Critics are useless
A friend of a friend is preparing for civil services exam. He loves to debate on big things like the economy and international relations. At 27, he’s never earned money. Takes from his parents. He also is a volunteer teacher in an orphanage. Very noble man. I was initially impressed by him but then it struck me. If he’s never sold his brainy skills to make money even once, why should I be buying into his ideas? I don’t meet him now. He’s busy identifying pseudo intellectuals in his room.
Texting makes no sense for serious matters
The point of a conversation is to let two or more people engage at the same time in an almost similar vibe. Opposite of this happens while texting. Sender and receiver are in a different mental space and neither of them knows what that might be for the other party. Took me quite a while to figure this out. Texting isn’t for anything serious or meaningful. Wanna get blocked? Text more than you should and eventually, you’ll reach there. I know this because I’ve been blocked many times for what I didn’t mean to say. I’m not at all creepy. Trust me.
You’re not the person you used to be and that’s fine
A friend of mine lives in the past. I was this and that in college and now all those beautiful years of my youth are gone. He thinks along those lines and doesn’t do anything in the present. Who he was then, he isn’t that today. I won’t say he’s worse but he acts as if he is worse than who he was. Saying that you are not the same person anymore is no reason for procrastinating. I stopped talking to him. Maybe I am no more the person who liked him before.
Be as clear as possible but others will still hear what they wanna hear
I sent an audio clip to my friend. She listened. It is good that you’re doing networking, came the reply in her audio clip with a little more information on what she was doing in her life. Do you know what is strange? I didn’t tell her I was networking. I told that I was designing content marketing strategy for a client. What she heard was not what I said. This happened in an audio clip that was clear in voice and meaning. She heard what she heard after filtering it through whatever she had in her head. From then on, being misunderstood doesn’t bother me much. Especially if I’m not face to face with that person.
Write what you have never ever read and risk getting judged
My friend sent me what she wrote on her blog. I read that. It is a boring cliché romance story, I told her. What made you write it, I later asked. It happened to me so it was worthy of being written and if you don’t like that, go fuck yourself. I had it coming. That was her way of looking at it. What I do is a little different. I write what I’ve never read but would want to read. Keeps me on my feet to engage a reader. I am not entitled to ask for someone’s time just because something happened to me. Instead, I make myself and a few folks similar to me read the thing which we’ve been trying to find but couldn’t find around us. That’s why I started this blog in 2016. Trying to make it worthy with every post.
Don’t trust those who have one reason and one solution for big things
You’ll consider your field of work to be of utmost importance. Teachers value degrees, feminists blame patriarchy, police catches thieves, bankers appreciate mutual funds and so on. No one is right. And no one is wrong. If I take any one of these people’s opinions, I’ve short-sighted myself to the reality of the world which works in diversity and not in niche-specific ideas and skills held in isolation. That’s why I prefer to not align with any particular school of thought but love knowing about things from different domains. Keeps the mind open.
Sometimes ideologies have to be private
My friend was raising funds for an alternative learning centre that he runs for kids. He found a man who was happy to donate 10K per month for 1 year which makes it 1.2L per annum. But before that funder made the first month’s payment, shit happened. He saw my friend’s FB timeline. It was full of liberal thoughts. The funder wasn’t into that and decided not to donate. My friend’s real work suffered because of his virtual identity. I learned a very important lesson. The world can do very well without my opinions. They can stay private. I deleted my FB account. End of story. That friend is still engaging in a digital war of words on an empty pocket.
Lessons don’t end here. They keep on coming and going. Crucial ones stick. The recurring ones get reinforced. These were the crucial and recurring ones. I might write more in the future. If in the last 5 minutes, you gained even one insight, keep that close to your heart. Or better yet, spot that insight when you see it.
Arpit Chhikara 